Let's Go

This is a story I wrote during the Covid-19 pandemic (I guess it was on a particularly sad day - I can't remember at the moment). I've been told it's made people feel a lot of emotions - sadness being the most powerful one, which is exactly what I was hoping for. This is pretty much my first time writing a 'sad' short story, so I hope you enjoy!

“We are going to New York City!!!” Mara exclaimed, jumping up and down on the balls of her feet. Aanya smiled at her daughter’s enthusiasm, trying - and failing - to be as joyful as her, as a queasy feeling encompassed her instead.

They finished dinner and sent Mara off to bed, telling her they’d have a big day of packing tomorrow. The second they heard her humming come to an end, Aanya let the worried frown she’d been holding back appear on her face.

“You sure it has to be New York, hon?” she asked, knowing her wife Sophia was going to nod just as she had the last 28 times Aanya asked.

“Look, you don’t have to go if you don’t want to, but… I don’t have a choice,and you can’t keep Mara cooped up here and never let her go on a vacation.”

“I know, but what if-”

“There isn’t a dangerous virus killing millions of people all around the world anymore, Aanya. And if you can’t come I’ll still take good care of her. You need to let go.”

She sighs and nods wearily, her mind immediately flashing back to a memory of her. Ava said those exact words to her the day she was leaving and Aanya wouldn’t stop hugging her.

“You need to let go. I’ll be back soon anyway, drama queen.”

Aanya didn’t know it then, but that would be the last time she’d be with her twin sister.

The trip started off normal. They were thirteen, and they just wanted to test what it would be like away from each other for a while. No 3-year-olds pointing at them, no kids their age asking them endless and nonsensical questions like, ‘Why don’t you wear the same clothes?” or, “Can you feel each other's pain?” and every once in a while, “Can you read each other’s minds?”

They just needed a break to try and be normal for a couple weeks and then come back and be together again.

Aanya, being the homebody she was, stayed with their mom while Ava had gone to NYC with their dad. They were both so excited, making sure to set a time to call every single night so they would stay connected. The trip was going absolutely amazing-at least until the Covid-19 pandemic hit. It had been showing up on international news but was totally downplayed, making it seem as though it was safe to travel. So Ava had gone, but a week after she had been staying at the hotel, news reached of a lot of covid cases in New York.

Since there were still two more weeks left of their vacation, Aanya’s family-being the naive people they were-decided Ava and their father could get a chance to finish their vacation.

They didn’t.

After the second week ended and the twins were separated for an unknown amount of time, Ava got an idea.

Dearest Aanya,

Remember when we were younger and we fantasized about writing letters to each other? Like if we found out we were princesses but only one of us wanted to live in a castle, so we’d write long letters to each other about our ‘lives’? Well, since it’s kind of like that now, I was thinking that maybe we could do that again! But there’s another twist: the letters would take forever to reach, so we could just type emails in letter format! It would be just as easy and fun, but a whole lot faster, right? What do you think? Everyone says quarantine won’t last long anyway, so we won’t have to do this until we’re like 18 or something.

I love you and miss you and hope you think about my suggestion,

Ava

P.S. I’m calling you before I go to bed anyway so we can talk then.

Aanya memorized that first letter, as it was all she had left of the beginning of the end other than the rest of her memories. But apparently she was subconsciously in the mood to cry because she went down to the basement and pulled out the basket in which she kept all of the printouts of the letters. She made them a few years after the trip. Well, she made them to make the emails look like actual letters to keep them not just on a computer. The papers rustled as she picked them up, finally finding the second letter and trying to read through the fancy Spectral font she had chosen.

Dear Ava,

I hope this letter reaches you well.

After sorting through my abundance of thoughts concerning your suggestion, I have come to the decision to continue our journey of crafting letters and directing them to each other. I am sure it will bring us much joy and fun during these following wearisome and otherwise uninteresting days.

Yesterday I was visiting the grocery store with our dearest mother to purchase some necessities, and this little boy, about five years of age, strode up to me and asked me a question that gave me quite a lot of nostalgia. He said with his loud and adorable voice, “Didn’t you used to have a twin? I have a twin, so then where’s yours?” I smiled at him and nodded-because what better could I do?-and sent him off back to his family, wondering how he could have known us. Then I saw he indeed did have a twin, looking so much like his brother it brought tears to my eyes, but also an older sister, one of our companions. Sophia is the one I speak of, and she waved to me with her eyes crinkled. I couldn’t tell, however, if she was smiling or scowling because of the mask that covered half of her face, just like mine. I waved back before our mother pulled me away to continue our task.

Anyways, all thoughts of this incident aside, I have been meaning to tell you that I am practicing the skill of writing in a sophisticated style. I am very curious as to what you think of it.

I miss you so very much, sweet Ava.

Aanya

Dear Aanya,

Our English teacher would be so proud of you if she read that. I kinda like it, but it must’ve taken you forever to write. Anyway, what in the world happened to you???

It’s only been two weeks and you go around calling me sweet-when have you ever called me sweet? When has anyone ever called me sweet?!

Anyway, nothing that interesting has happened to me yet. Dad and I did go outside once to just walk a bit-we didn’t go too far and we had our masks on, so you don’t have to worry-but the place was so empty! Obviously, I haven’t been here before, but in all the movies it shows this place filled with people! Right now, I can walk for 30 minutes and only see five other people. This is definitely not what I signed up for when I said I wanted to come here. Although, I guess it’s better this way since there’s less of a chance of the thing spreading.

It’s cool that you got to see Sophia and her brothers! Even though you didn’t get to say hi… To be honest, I kind of miss going to the grocery store and doing normal things. I think this trip is cursed and all of this has happened because we wanted to be separate. When we get out of this, you have to promise me we’ll go on every single vacation together until we’re 40, alright?

I‘ve got to go have lunch now so bye! As always, love you.

Ava

Aanya read through more and more of the letters until she reached near the bottom of the stack. The second she read the first line, the smile on her lips from the previous letters vanished as she saw the change of font. Ava never did something out of pattern or routine which was the first thing that got Aanya worried when she first read the letter.

Dear Aanya,

He’s sick. He doesn’t want you or mom to come over. He says he’s not so bad that he has to go to the hospital, and he’s making me stay locked in my room with a few bags of bread, a jar of nutella, and a few giant jugs of water. He’s been on the couch all day, and I’m not even allowed to help him. I’m calling tonight.

Love you.

Ava

They called that night and Ava came out of her room wearing a mask for a minute to give Aanya and their mom a glimpse of their dad. He tried to wave away all of their fears and worries, saying things like, “I’ll be alright.” Aanya actually believed him at first, her optimism taking over, but when she saw the state of her twin, it was like a dark cloud blocked out the light of her hope.

Aanya still remembered how Ava’s face was creased with worry lines that wouldn’t go away, no matter how much her family tried to comfort her, and there was a look of helplessness in her eyes. She couldn’t stop fearing for their dad’s life, saying she saw other covid cases and other people dying on news channels. Of course, Aanya had seen that too, but she never imagined that as a possibility for her dad. Or her mom. And especially not her sister.

Which was why, about three weeks of worrying and crying and wishing she and her sister never planned that trip later, she was even more heart-broken.

Her dad had recovered, all four of them celebrating and glad for the first few days. But not long after, they went into another period of worrying and helplessness. And this time all traces of Aanya’s old optimism were gone.

Ava had covid. And it was much worse than their dad’s.

To this day, Aanya would not stop blaming herself for it. First of all, her dad and Ava wouldn’t even have been in NYC had she not brought up the idea.

But also, the thing that hurt even more, was that the night before her sister was taken to the hospital, when they called, she saw Ava coughing. She just chose not to believe that her sister was sick, especially after her father just recovered. But maybe, if she had told their dad about it, he could’ve done something sooner, before Ava started wheezing. Maybe he could’ve done something before Ava collapsed. Maybe, he could’ve saved Ava’s life.

The trip to New York in the beginning of 2020 that started off totally normal, ended with Aanya’s father coming home with only one daughter. It ended with Aanya’s mom never getting to properly say goodbye to one of her children. It ended with Aanya losing her other half.

She was brought back to earth from the feeling of the paper she was holding getting softer from the wetness of her tears. She re-read the last words of the last letter from her sister.

Love you.

Ava

“You alright?” Sophia asked suddenly, making her jump.

“No.”

Instead of replying, she just frowned slightly and made her way over to where Aanya was sitting, trying to wipe the tears from her sobs away from her face. The second Sophia saw the pile of papers on her lap, her frown turned into a sad smile.

“I miss her too. If you’re scared for tomorrow, just think about what she would do, yeah?” she said, sitting down and wrapping an arm around Aanya. She nodded.

“But also think about what you actually want and think is right. I know you know what to do. Don’t let the fear take over, alright? I can help Mara understand if you want. It’s up to you.” Aanya nodded again, this time giving Sophia a tiny small.

They stayed there for a while, both of them lost in their own thoughts, until Sophia broke the silence, saying, “We should sleep. Early morning tomorrow.”

They put back the letters and got up, but before they could leave the room, Sophia said one last thing.

“After Ava, I was too scared of leaving my brothers, and wouldn’t let them go anywhere without me or each other. But then I realized that they have their own lives, and I couldn’t control them forever because of my fears.”

Aanya nodded once more, but this time it came with a frown. A thoughtful frown, one that meant she understood what Sophia was trying to say.

Before she could disappear up the stairs, Aanya called after her.

“Mara’s going to New York City!”

by Gazala Shah